Baby Crying

Crying is one of the most difficult and heart-wrenching sounds to a parent. Crying is a signal that your baby needs your help and support.

At Tresillian, we know how tough it is to understand why you're baby is crying. Reassure yourself that it’s not your fault that your baby is going through a normal crying phase. Here you can find some ways of coping with your baby that won't stop crying. We also have some more strategies for babies that cry at bedtime or during sleep.

If you need help, you could visit your local GP or Child and Family Health Nurse or call the Tresillian Parent Help Line on 1300 272 736.

Why your 3 to 6 month old baby cries

Your baby can’t communicate their needs to you with words until well into their second year. One way they can communicate with you is through crying.

There are many reasons why your 3 to 6 month old might be screaming. Physical reasons for crying are often easier to understand. They might be:

• A nappy change
• A feed
• A sleep
• A tummy upset
• Being hot or cold
• Being uncomfortable
• Being tired

Or they may be crying because of an emotional need. This means your baby needs help to manage their feelings because they're too young to do that on their own. These feelings may include:

• Loneliness
• Anger
• Fear
• Sadness
• Overstimulation from noise or lights
• Separation from you
• Needing you to settle to sleep at bedtime or overnight

Sometimes, you may not know exactly why your baby is crying. The pitch and urgency of their cry might give you some clues.

Other ways your baby communicates

Your baby can also use facial expressions and head, legs, arms and hand movement to communicate. For example, when your baby is ready to play, they may be:

• Lifting their head and face to you
• Gazing straight into your eyes with bright, shiny and alert eyes
• Reaching to you with their arms
• Smiling

These are strong messages your baby is ready to socialise and enjoy time with you.

However there are other messages your baby may give you. For example, if your baby is overstimulated, they may be:

• Frowning
• Looking away or looking down with dull or glazed eyes
• Yawning and or mouthing hands
• Pulling at ears or rubbing head

Your baby is saying "I’ve had enough playing and I’m ready to have a break or I’m ready to stop socialising altogether". Your baby may be ready for a feed or sleep.

If those cues are missed, they may need a break or time out and become overwhelmed or distressed.

When that happens, your baby can give some strong messages to tell you they need some help to calm down and have a rest. These include:

• Turning their head away
• Starting to flap arms around
• Arching their back
• Showing you a very sad face
• Fussing
• Crying or won't stop crying

What you can do when your baby cries

When your baby shows these cues, it means they have become overloaded with stimulation and need to take a break. Here’s what you can do:

• If your baby becomes overwhelmed or distressed and shows you “I need a break” cues, it’s time to soothe and calm your baby.
• The most important thing that you can do is watch your baby carefully and follow your baby’s lead. This can give you much more information about what her non-verbal messages actually mean.

All the non-verbal cues are small moment-by-moment actions that are not always easy to identify and like all languages you have to watch closely and learn your baby’s non-verbal language.

Each cue is like hearing a single word. You can’t get meaning from one word - you have to hear a whole sentence. That’s the same for your baby’s cues.

Settling your crying baby